What is online counseling/online therapy? I keep hearing these terms…

I’ll start by saying that our counseling team in Columbia, Mo offers both individual counseling and therapy as well as couples therapy and marriage counseling via an online format. And I’ve gone into this a handful of times over the past few weeks (an overview here, faqs here, and an online couples therapy and marriage counseling blog here), but I’ll offer a little bit of clarity before diving into how it can be useful for anxiety therapy.

Online counseling/online therapy is, quite literally, counseling/therapy done via an online video format. We use a platform that links up with an app for clients and also gives clients the option of using their laptop or computer for sessions. We basically ask that folks just find a private space, use headphones (if doing individual work), and make sure they have internet connection. And that’s about it!

Is online counseling/online therapy an effective for treating anxiety?

You can guess my answer to this question, but I’ll say it anyway.

YES. Absolutely yes. With some caveats. If you’re coming in for generalized anxiety or social anxiety, then this is absolutely an avenue that can (and, ideally, should) be effective for treatment. What we offer is coping and treatment for people who struggle with more generalized anxiety, whether this is from an existential crisis, quarter-life crisis, related to body image or self-esteem, or besties (#sarcasm) with shame and guilt.

If you’re looking for online counseling/therapy for selective mutism, separation anxiety, or panic disorder, then it would make more sense to be in person and with somebody who distinctly specializes in that type of work. Additionally, obsessive-compulsive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder (although note considered anxiety disorders at this point) should be addressed through more specific approaches. If you want or need referrals for folks who do that work, we’re happy to help you! Email us directly and we’ll make some relevant recommendations for you.

Can anxiety be cured with therapy or counseling?

This is a loaded question.

Yes (sorta) and no, but the answer really depends on how you experience anxiety and how you think about anxiety.

If you’re experiencing an acute form of anxiety for the first time in your life and you’re just very confused about what’s happening and why, then yes, it makes sense that some counseling and therapy could help to “cure” your anxiety.

However, if you’ve been experiencing anxiety for years on end with little to no relief, then probably not. It makes sense that we can lower your anxiety, yes. It makes sense that we can learn to manage anxiety, yes. It even makes sense that we can help you to feel better about your anxiety, yes.

But to cure it entirely after you’ve been experiencing it for years and years on end? No, probably not.

And with all that said, there’s also the whole philosophical stance that anxiety is a normal part of the human experience!!!

Big hint for you (if it’s not obvious) is that our online counseling/online therapy approach embraces this, much in the same way our in-person counseling/therapy does. Basically, anxiety is embedded in our DNA. It’s part of being alive and relishing the life you live. To have zero anxiety is a pretty big (and improbable) ask. To have a level that’s able to be joyfully lived with? That’s more realistic (and still hard for some people to attain).

All that said, we’ll do everything we can to help you find your happy level of anxiety. Yes, such a thing can (and often does) exist.

Okay, but can anxiety be cured with online therapy or online counseling?

I’m pretty much going to say the same thing as the section above. Yes (sorta) and no. Yes, depending on the type of anxiety. No, depending on the type of anxiety. And also some anxiety is part of the human experience.

Boom. Roasted. #TheOfficeForever

How long does anxiety therapy take (including online therapy for anxiety)?

Meh. It’s hard to say. Here’s a quick formula for you. Simplified, but based on research.

Therapy > No Therapy

More Therapy > Less Therapy

In essence, you should see an impact in your life relatively quickly. However (and how detailed can I get here?), seeing a change or two or three in your life doesn’t equal long-term success. What we really want to see is a change (or multiple changes) combined with sustainability and maintenance. The hard part about this is that you’ll feel ‘push back’ on changes at different intervals.

Think of it this way. Did you see the movie Cars? As a total side note, I freaking love that movie. I cry every time in the end when Lightning McQueen gives up his win for The King (#spoiler). It’s just so touching (hence the tears)!

My point, though, is that in the movie, Lightning has to repave the road that he destroys in Radiator Springs before heading to California for his big race. Repaving the road wasn’t planned. It was an accident, but he’s kind of a jerk in the beginning of the movie, so you don’t feel too bad for him when he gets stuck.

So, he starts repaving the road while basically hating his life. Stuck in “hillbilly hell” repaving a road (that he has to get done within the week) while missing out on the life he wants to be living. Let’s pause real quick and think about the parallels to anxiety. Feeling stuck and unhappy, and wanting to anywhere but lost in the feeling you’re having. It’s intense.

So then, Lightning gets the bright (read: terrible) idea to repave it lightning (#Heyo) fast. Another spoiler, in case you haven’t seen the move: it doesn’t work. The small amount of road he paved slowly is smooth, but the vast majority of the rest is super bumpy and not really drive-able.

Let’s pause and parallel counseling/therapy again, shall we? RUSHING THE PROCESS DOESN’T WORK. Simple enough.

Ultimately, he slows his roll (#OnPointWithMyPuns), makes social connections and forges meaningful relationships, starts to value where he is while still having a bigger goal for himself, and realizes it’s not so bad. In essence, he submitted to the experience and process while trusting that his work would get him through.

One last time, counseling/therapy parallel. I’m sure you can guess, but I’ll clarify. Submitting to the process doesn’t mean giving up control forever. It simply means accepting where you currently are, making the most/best of it while creating meaningful relationships, and still working towards a bigger goal. This is therapy. This is counseling. This is why we don’t rush the process and also why we don’t try to fix things quickly. There are more reasons, but the above highlights some.

What if I get anxiety before my therapy/counseling session?

Welcome to the club! Sounds kind of wild, but it’s not uncommon that people feel nervous, anxious, or downright scared before their counseling or therapy session.

I mean, think about it. At what other point in your life do you walk into somebody’s (virtual) office and bare your soul? We’re talking no-holds-barred, vulnerable af, open, honest, and raw conversation. That is HARD. It is legitimately difficult to do. It’s not something for the feint of heart, and it sure as hell isn’t easy. To clarify, you don’t have to do this right away! This is something we work up to and you do when you have a sense of safety and trust with your clinician.

At the exact same time, it’s refreshing, relieving, empowering, and can lead to growth you didn’t know or think possible. There’s something really sacred in that space, but all of that doesn’t take away from the fact that it’s terrifying for people. This is more the case for folks who are coming for the first time, starting with a new clinician, or are restarting after having a bad experience with another clinician (yes, this happens and no, we don’t like it happening).

I want to start online anxiety therapy/counseling. Now what?

Simple answer. You can email us directly to get something on the books, you can call us at 573-586-3204, or you can submit your contact information by clicking the link below and we’ll get back to you asap! Kudos to you for taking this big step, as a side note. Getting started can be hard for folks. Be well and happy counseling!

About the Author

Tara Vossenkemper, PhD, LPC
Individual Counselor & Therapist, Couples Therapist & Marriage Counselor | Columbia, Mo

Tara Vossenkemper is the founder, owner, and practicing counselor/therapist with The Counseling Hub with a Ph.D. in counselor education and supervision (earned from the nationally recognized UM - Saint Louis counselor education program). She specializes in couples therapy & marriage counseling using the highly effective Gottman Method Couples Therapy (and has completed their three levels of training).

Tara has a diverse set of clinical experiences, working with both adolescents and adults on issues ranging from eating disorders and anxiety to spirituality and existential crises. However, she is most passionate about couples counseling. Tara enjoys working with couples looking to decrease or enhance conflict, relearn healthy and effective communication, or are healing from an affair. She's also been formally trained in the Prepare-Enrich Premarital Couples Counseling approach and the PREP Approach for couples counseling.

Tara has presented at national, regional, and state conferences, as well as locally, on the topics of couples therapy and marriage counseling, discrimination, sexual minority distress, spirituality, healthy lifestyle and mental health, and private practice.