Two-Day Intensive Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling

Couples Therapy & Marriage Counseling | Columbia, Mo

What is intensive couples therapy and marriage counseling?

A very good question. Short answer is this - it’s four months of couples therapy in two days. Ha! Seriously though, it’s two consecutive eight-hour days of couples therapy. We call it intensive because of the intense nature of the approach. And you may or may not know, but a few of our team specialize in couples therapy and marriage counseling, and I speak for all of us when I say that striving for excellence is of the utmost importance, even when we’re not taking a ‘standard’ couples therapy approach.

Is this different from “regular” couples therapy and marriage counseling?

Yes, sorta. It’s different in that we stay hyper-focused for these two days and have approximately two follow up sessions spaced out over the following six to nine months. This is very unlike a standard approach where you may have weekly or bi-weekly sessions. However, it’s similar in that during the two days, you’ll spend your time doing the couples therapy work. Think of it like getting four months of couples therapy in a matter of two days. It’s couples therapy “on steroids.”

But why? What’s the rationale for this?

That’s a great question. The rationale is that we want to be able to offer quick-hitting, intensive approaches for folks who don’t have the time or capacity to engage in the long-term type of couples therapy that we know and love. For some couples, being in the space and staying there is when most of the changes take place. It’s not a reset, necessarily, but it’s a way of getting some deep work done in a shortened amount of time.

I hear you use Gottman Method Couples Therapy as an approach? Does that work with the two-day couples therapy intensives?

My favorite question so far! Yes, it does. The Gottman Institute has actually been conducting research on marathon sessions in the last year or so, and findings indicate that it can be as effective as standard therapy (which is amazing to read)! Also, during the two days, we’re going to be learning and using a lot of Gottman techniques and tools, and the approach in the two days will be very much akin to what you would expect out of standard weekly or bi-weekly couples therapy using Gottman methodology.

Am I a good fit for intensive couples therapy and marriage counseling?

Not all people are, but here’s how you know you might be. You and your partner are struggling with:

• old hurts that keep popping up, but never feel resolved
  *when you think or hear your partner say, “Why do we keep talking about this?” <-an indicator of things being unresolved

• conflict - you’re bad at fighting with each other, whether it’s not fighting at all or excessive conflict

• limited skills for navigating uncomfortable conversations, so they just don’t happen or they go sideways when they do happen

• discussions around specific topics (like finances, in-laws, or parenting) and you want space to dive in with a helpful third party

If you’re recovering from a recent affair or infidelity, this probably isn’t the best fit for you. That work can be beautiful, but it takes longer than what we can really offer in two days. Additionally, if only one person in the relationships wants to engage in this and the other is resistant, this probably isn’t the best fit at this point. It’s intense, and all parties need to be interested and willing to be physically, emotionally, and mentally present.

How long does intensive couples therapy and marriage counseling last?

You can probably read this in the title of the page, but it lasts for two days. Basically, it’s 9a-5p Friday and Saturday, with 1-hour break for lunch each day. There’s an assessment process that takes place in the week leading up to your intensive, which is an additional 3.5 hours total.

What can I expect during intensive couples therapy and marriage counseling?

There’s a lot of directions this answer could go, but here’s the gist. You can expect:

• to have candid, open, and honest dialogue around whatever topics or issues that have brought you in to couples therapy

• to learn new, highly effective ways of communicating

• to actively practice new skills so that you generalize them outside of the sessions

• to learn new techniques and tools for communicating, understanding, and deepening your interactions

• to work towards compromise on those ‘really stuck’ issues that you keep arguing about

• to receive a written report at the end of your intensive

My partner is concerned about being in the counseling room for that long of a time. What should I tell them?

This is a really fantastic point. A two-day couples therapy intensive doesn’t really sound like “fun” for most people. That’s totally fine (and expected), but let’s break down what this experience might actually be like.

1. You will take breaks. Lots of breaks.
   Breaks are your friend here. At any given point, we can take five. If taking five happens every 10 minutes, we’ve probably got a different issue to discuss (read: avoidance), but if you want to take a few minutes every hour, then we’ll do just that.
   *it’s also worth it to mention that most people say therapy flies by, so the hour might go faster than you think

2. You will have access to some snacky snacks and will leave the office for lunch. Use this time to decompress.
   No need to stay discussing therapy-related things during your lunch. Typically, I’d encourage folks to continue discussing, but in this case, I would encourage you to not discuss. Take some actual time ‘off’ from the meaningful discussion during your lunch.

3. We won’t stay in the deep end the entire time.
   My goal isn’t to overwhelm you into submission. It’s to help facilitate meaningful, intentional, and healing conversations between parties and to help folks engage in lighthearted conversations. I’d hazard a guess that people think therapy is constant pressure or a constant push for “deep insights,” but relationships and life are all about ebbs and flows, and this shows up in the therapy office, as well. We will have deep conversations that might feel difficult, but that’s not the only ‘space’ we’ll be in.

I’m interested in a two-day intensive. What are my next steps?

Next steps are easy. You can contact us by clicking the button below or you can email us directly. We’re excited you’re thinking about this and can’t wait to get you started with the intensive couples therapy work!